Mixed Messages
by Carly-M
Summary: Roses are red, violets are blue, the study group drive each other crazy, what else is new?


**Title:** Mixed Messages  
><strong>Author:<strong> Carly  
><strong>Character(s)Pairing(s):** J/A, T/B, Study Group  
><strong>Spoilers:<strong> Up to 3.10  
><strong>RatingWarnings:** PG  
><strong>Word Count:<strong> 3926  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> I don't own Community.  
><strong>Summary:<strong> Roses are red, violets are blue, the study group drive each other crazy, what else is new?  
><strong>Notes:<strong> Written for the Milady/Milord Valentine's Day fic exchange on LJ.

* * *

><p>Shirley gripped the steering wheel of her van as another round of thunder bellowed in the distance. The rest of the study group were huddled in the car with her: Pierce in the front, Abed, Troy and Britta in the middle and Jeff and Annie in the back.<p>

"Please tell me we're almost at our destination," said Annie, casting a worried eye outside at the grey sky.

"Maybe it'll be our _Final Destination_," said Abed. "Look out for any lightning hitting telephone poles. Or a set of elaborate mishaps that ends up with one of us getting decapitated by a Frisbee."

"You just keep your movie soothsaying to yourself, you hear me?" Shirley glared at him through the rear-view mirror. "Andre and I have plans tonight and I'd like to keep all my body parts intact."

"I'll bet you would," said Pierce.

"Britta?"

"On it," Britta replied, leaning forward to smack Pierce across the head. "Shirley's car, Shirley's rules," she smirked, receiving a hateful stare.

"Am I still coming over at seven o'clock, Shirley?" asked Annie.

"That should be fine, sweetie. Ben will be in bed by then so you'll just have to worry about the other two." Shirley paused. "And the raccoon living under our house, but he only comes out when he's hungry."

"Excuse me?"

"Hang on, you're volunteering to babysit tonight?" said Jeff. "On Valentine's Day?"

Annie shrugged. "Yeah, so?"

"Oh nothing. I just thought this was the kind of day you liked to embrace. Y'know, throwing around hearts, vomiting rainbows and glitter, that sort of thing."

"I think you have me confused with a My Little Pony," she retorted. "Besides, the only Valentine's thing I was remotely considering was the Greendale dance… until I remembered how uneventful the last two were."

"I don't know about that," said Troy. "I mean, Pierce and I had our junk all danced up on by Chang a couple of years ago. And last year Britta made out with a chick and managed to make it, like, the least sexy thing ever, so…" He screwed up his nose. "Yeah, you kind of have a point."

Annie searched through her backpack. "Admittedly Jeff was right about one thing: I do have hearts to throw around." She pulled out some small, pink gift bags with a flourish. "Candy hearts! I thought we could all use some cheering up today."

Jeff watched as she passed the bags up to the front of the car before receiving his own. Troy couldn't contain his excitement.

"Oh man, you should totally see Abed nail the messages on these things!" he grinned. "He's like a candy wizard."

"Troy," said Abed, placing a hand on his friend's shoulder. "Let me just reiterate: I lied. I'm not a candy wizard."

"You're just being modest, man. Here, close your eyes and try read this one."

"It's not going to work."

Troy's face fell. "No, that's not what it says." He looked out the side window. "Damn thunder must be messing with your mojo."

"I think I got some half-assed ones," said Pierce, scrutinizing a blue candy. "This one just says 'Q' and then 'T'. Who made these? Sesame Street?"

"No Pierce," Annie giggled. "The letters stand for 'cutie'."

"Oh." A pleased smile spread across his face. "Well, _of course_."

"Read one of mine out," said Shirley, nudging her bag towards Pierce.

"This one says 'hot stuff'."

"Aww, that's nice!"

Pierce frowned. "Obviously this one was meant for me too."

Britta twisted her body around so she was facing the back seat. "As nice as this was, Annie, you know how I feel about commercialized holidays." She opened up her parcel. "It's all just a ruse to… Aww! This one says 'Wub U'!" Britta tipped out the rest of the sugary sweets. "Aren't you just the most adorable widdle candies ever?"

"Alright then, let's see what I've got," Jeff said, peering into his bag with a smirk. "Picture of a smiley face… that's cool." He took out another one. "This one says 'Hello'." His face dropped slightly as he picked up another handful. "Thumbs up symbol, peace sign, 'Yay'…"

"Sure it doesn't say 'gay'?" Pierce hollered at him.

"_That's_ the guy you give the 'QT' one to?" Jeff wryly replied.

"Oh, you know how it is with packaged things," said Annie, waving her hand around dismissively. "One time I had a can of alphabet soup with only vowels in it. _No consonants for you_!" she said in a Soup Nazi voice, her laughter subsiding when Jeff only blinked at her. "I'm sure there's a few hearts in there with nice messages."

Jeff glanced at another candy in his palm. "This one's just completely blank."

"Ooh, candy burn," Troy breathed out quietly.

"There's no burn, I don't care," said Jeff, forcing out a laugh. "Seriously, it's the thought that counts and all that junk, so let's just thank Annie and move on." He glanced to his right. "Thank you for the cavity pills, Annie," he smirked at her, earning an eye roll in return.

"Yeah, thanks Annie," echoed Abed. "I'll save the 'marry me' ones until last. Yellow's my favorite."

Jeff frowned. "The plural _what now_?"

"We're finally here, everyone," Shirley sang out, finding a place to park her van near the edge of the woods. "Make sure you rug up."

"What the hell is this place called?" asked Britta, uneasily eyeing the unbeaten tracks leading into the seemingly endless wall of trees. "Serial killers' paradise?"

"It's not that bad, Britta," said Annie, flinching when she heard an eagle soar overhead. "Professor Kane said this was the best place to find the plant life we need for our Biology project."

"I don't think we're going to find many alive things out there."

Shirley unbuckled her belt and opened the door. "Look, I don't care if we find the Loch Ness Monster or sparkly vampires out there," she swung her purse over her shoulder. "I just want to get the plants and get out so I'm home in time for snuggles with my husband."

"And I would like to find the plants so I can get the image of snuggle time out of my head – even though I am sure you two are adorable," Jeff drawled.

"You bet your sweet ass we are."

"How about we break up into groups then?" suggested Annie. "That way we'll cover more ground and hopefully find everything we need before the rain sets in."

"Sounds good to me," said Britta. "Shirley's not the only one with a date tonight."

"I thought you hated 'commercialized holidays'?" said Jeff.

She flinched. "I do… this date just happened to fall on the 14th. No biggie."

Troy began to laugh. "Yeah, good one, Britta. What have you and your cats got planned tonight? Catnaps? CAT scans?" He shook his head affectionately. "I am on fire."

"For your information, funny guy, my cats are staying at home to watch re-runs of Gilligan's Island." She held her head up high. "I'm being taken out to dinner."

Troy's smile began to fade. "By who?"

"First name 'Nunya', second name 'Beeswax'."

"… Does this mean you might be Britta Beeswax one day? Because _that_ is stupid."

"Oh for crying out loud," Jeff muttered under his breath before tugging Annie's arm. "Come on, let's go find these magical middle of nowhere plants before my ears bleed."

"Alright. But if you make me do all the work again just remember – I'm the one with the map." Annie gathered her backpack and jumped out of the car, leading Jeff to the track on the right.

Britta stalked off towards the middle track, leaving Troy to chase after her. "Wait up, Beeswax! Just tell me where this mystery dude's taking you? I'll bet it won't have toilet olives!"

"I guess that just leaves us," said Abed, waiting for Pierce to get out of the van so Shirley could lock up. "This unusual group formation has the potential to be very interesting." His face remained blank. "I'm excited for the adventure."

Pierce grinned. "I get to be included on an adventure?"

"Yep. We should have a name like all classic trios."

"Well I'd suggest The Three Musketeers but everyone knows you need a sword for that club."

Shirley grimaced. "I don't get it."

Pierce gestured at his pants. "I'm talking about penises."

"No, what I don't get is how I got stuck with you." She glared at him. "Maybe these woods _are_ gonna have a dead body in them…"

* * *

><p>Annie consulted her Biology worksheet before surveying her surrounds. "I think that leafy plant over there by the pink flowers is one of the ones off the list." She took a small hand shovel out of her pack and walked over to dig it up.<p>

Jeff joined her and held open a plastic bag for her to put the plant in. "Nice work. _Thumbs-up_ for that one."

She narrowed her eyes at his tone. "Thank you?"

"You're welcome." He amicably took the sheet out of her hands. "Oh look, I just spotted another plant on the list. _Yay_."

"… Nice to see you're taking an interest in something."

"Oh yeah," Jeff said, "love me some Biology. I guess I just get a big old _smiley face_ when I think about molecules and crap."

Realization dawned on Annie as she pointed her shovel at him in bemusement. "Oh my God, you're seriously mocking me with your candy heart messages. Are you five years old?"

He smirked at her. "What? Can't a guy enjoy a gift from a friend?"

"Obviously not." She peered at him curiously. "Why are you taking this to heart so much? Pun not intended."

"Pfft, as if. I'm just messing around with you." Jeff swapped her the sheet for the shovel. "Come on, let's get the next one before that eagle I can hear screeching mistakes us for unmoving prey."

Annie stared at Jeff's retreating figure before shaking her head and following.

* * *

><p>"Is it someone in our drama class?"<p>

"No, Troy."

"Someone in our Bio class?"

"No."

"Someone in…"

"It's no one from Greendale, OK!"

Troy cleared a branch out of the way so their path was clear. "You're bringing an outsider into the group? I don't think I'm down with that."

"Well tough luck because you don't get a say." Britta tugged her leather jacket closer to her body. "Why do you even care anyway? It's not like you have to date him."

"Um, excuse me, Britta, but when someone brings someone else into our lives it disrupts the whole flow." He picked a random leaf off a tree and shoved it into his pocket. "Remember how off things were with Professor Slater around? Lukka? That time Pierce found a Tamagotchi at a yard sale and became weirdly obsessed with it?"

Britta grimaced. "He sent a Tweet out every time it pooped."

"See? New people upset the balance."

"Well what about if you started dating someone?" asked Britta. "Would you be saying the same stuff you are now?"

Troy looked down at his feet. "Maybe my person would fit in better," he muttered, twisting some foliage in his hands. "Maybe I'd date someone who already knew how our group worked and it'd be OK."

Britta's face softened as Troy glanced up at her. "Troy…" She suddenly flinched. "Troy! You're playing around with poison ivy!"

Troy shrieked, before crazily rubbing his hands on his trousers. "Oh God, I'm gonna die! I'm gonna die by a Batman villain! This is the coolest most horrible thing ever," he scream-sobbed.

* * *

><p>Shirley marched up the rocky path while Abed and Pierce trailed behind.<p>

"What about The Three Amigos?" said Pierce. "I like those guys."

"We can't do that, Pierce, for obvious reasons," said Abed.

"Like what?"

"We've already tried our hand at the whole western genre."

"Oh." Pierce pondered some more. "How about those three Chipmunks? Melvin and all that crap?"

"3D animation. That might work. Let's see, Theodore could be…"

"If I hear that short, little round one's name coming my way I know two chipmunks that are going to be left behind in the woods," Shirley called out to them through gritted teeth, getting silence in return. "Yeah, you just keep those thinking hats on."

* * *

><p>"We should be almost done," said Annie, packaging up another plant. "Just in time too, I can feel a few drops of rain."<p>

"I know. My hair's frizzing already."

"Drama queen, much?" she smiled. "So what do you need to keep your hair super-styled for?" she casually inquired. "Normal pedantic Jeff reasons or have you got a hot date tonight?"

They fell into step together as they trekked down the path. "What makes you think I have a date?" said Jeff.

"I don't know," she shrugged. "You've had Valentine's Day dates before."

"Yeah, and look how well they turned out." He turned up the collar of his jacket against the cold. "It's just another day to go out and get drunk at a bar. Nothing romantic about that."

"It's true," said Annie, registering his look of surprise. "Not the bar part. The whole 'it's just another day' aspect." She shifted her backpack around. "Sometimes I get swayed by the shininess of it all, y'know? But honestly, I've never had a nice Valentine's Day in my life."

"She says like she's a hundred years old," Jeff teased.

"It's true! I wasn't even with my gay high school boyfriend on Valentine's Day to get a half-hearted card that said 'You're the coolest'."

"You're the coolest?" said Jeff. "Was your high school boyfriend from the 50s?"

"No. I found out from him after we broke up that's what he wrote on all my cards so he wouldn't give me the wrong message." She snorted. "Probably should have thought of that before he started dating me _and_ ruining my enjoyment of Madonna's albums."

"Huh. That's weird," Jeff mused.

"I know. And it's not just her songs. I get eye twitches when I see women with overly muscly arms too."

"No, I mean the mixed messages part." He darted in front of her, Annie-style, to stop her from walking. "Sounds familiar somehow."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Oh really?"

"Really."

"You're seriously telling me those candy hearts were left up to the candy heart gods of faith?" He folded his arms.

She mimicked his stance. "Why is this bothering you so much?"

"Because I am way cuter than Grandpa Gassypants and you know it!" he exclaimed, before re-thinking his choice of words. "OK, maybe I _am_ five years old, but the point still stands!"

Annie glanced up at him, nervously chewing the inside of her lip. "I do know it. That's the problem." She sighed. "Look Jeff, I know we've made some progress with whatever this… thing is between us. But I still didn't want to push. I just thought if I started giving you little hearts with things like 'Marry me' and 'Be mine' on them, you'd freak out."

"Annie, I'm not about to jump off a cliff because of a few candy hearts."

"Because your reaction now is so mature?"

He matched her wry smile. "Touché."

"I'm sorry you felt left out," she said, brushing some hair behind her ear. "I just didn't think you'd care this much. Or that you'd even notice."

Jeff slowly exhaled. "I notice things when it comes to you," he said quietly, earning a shy smile from her.

"Oh."

They stood there, unsure of how to proceed, until the shadow of an eagle made slow circles above them causing their eyes to widen in terror.

"Annie?" said Jeff, stiffly.

"Yep?" she squeaked

"Run!"

* * *

><p>The rain relentlessly pounded down outside of Shirley's van while the study group sat inside, waiting for the storm to pass. They'd been lucky enough to all make it back before the heavens completely opened, but had been stuck there for an hour waiting for the worst to pass before Shirley could drive home.<p>

"I should be having my relaxing pre-date bubble bath right about now," sighed Shirley, checking her watch for the millionth time.

"I'm sorry, Shirley," said Abed. "Would you like two of the three tenors to sing you a song to lift your spirits?"

"No thank you. And what are you talking about, three tenors?" she frowned. "I thought we vetoed that on account of Pierce being Pierce about one of the names."

"I truly thought his name was Flaccid Flamingo," he sniffed, yelping when he felt someone swipe his head. "Keep your man hands to yourself, blondie!"

Britta stuck out her tongue. "Shirley's car, Shirley's rules, jackass."

"Hey Britta? I need your man hands over here," said Troy, pouting. "My hands are still itchy and Abed's beating me at the game."

"You're a child, you know that?" said Britta, but she couldn't help a small smile upturn her mouth. "Alright, where am I aiming?"

"Next to that green one."

Britta picked up a candy heart, licked one side, and stuck it to the roof of the van. "It worked! It's staying put!"

"That's fifteen all," said Abed, jotting down the score on his notepad. "It appears the odds are in both our favors."

"Shirley, aren't you concerned about having food on the roof of your van?" said Annie. "Not to mention it's a perfectly good waste of candy."

"It's just like having my boys in the car," said Shirley wearily. "Whatever keeps them quiet works for me."

Troy leant his head back to see how his other prospects were faring. "That 'kiss me' one above Jeff and Annie's heads is awesome. It's been stuck there for, like, five minutes." He grinned to himself. "It's kind of like a candy version of mistletoe. Candletoe!"

Jeff pursed his lips. "Mmm. Because nothing says 'kiss me' like being reminded of an unfortunate female pants situation."

Everyone groaned in disgust at the mental images except for Pierce. "Wait, he means camel toe, yeah?" he murmured.

"Pierce!" said Annie. "You don't need to say it out loud."

"I didn't! That's why I whispered – to avoid another bout of concussion from Brittles." He stared at her. "Good luck to your date tonight, that's all I have to say."

"As if I'd be mean to Dr Hopper, he comes up to my kneecap." Britta immediately clamped her mouth shut, knowing she'd given away too much.

"Wait, I _know_ that name," said Troy. "Me and Abed found that turtle around campus again that stupid Todd traumatized and took it to the non-magical Animal Hospital." His eyes widened. "Dr Hopper works there!"

"There's a guy at the Animal Hospital called Dr Hopper?" said Jeff. "Where do we live? Storybrooke?" he scoffed. "Not that I watch that crap," he muttered as an afterthought.

"No time to pick on you now, Jeff," Troy said with glee. "Britta's going on a date with an eighty-year-old like one of those weird reality TV people!"

"First of all, he's not eighty, he's seventy-seven," Britta retorted. "And I'm not looking for a rich sugar daddy – I'm just repaying a favor."

"_With your feminine charms_?" said Annie in slight horror.

"No! God you guys are lame." Britta slunk back into her seat. "One of my cats was really sick a few weeks ago and I didn't have enough money for the surgery. Dr Hopper saw how upset I was and offered to do it for free." She picked at her sweater. "I thought it was sweet so I offered to take him out on Valentine's Day because I knew his wife had passed away a few months ago and I thought he might be lonely."

"Aww, pumpkin, that's really nice of you," said Shirley.

Britta nodded. "I am pretty selfless."

"So this date is definitely not a 'messing with the balance' kind of thing then, huh?" said Troy, smiling.

"It definitely isn't," she smiled back.

Abed glanced between his two friends. "OK, what character progression have I missed this time?" When they only coyly shrugged at him in return, he turned his attention back towards Jeff and Annie. "Onto a dynamic I understand more. That 'kiss me' candy still hasn't dropped, just in case you were wondering."

"Pshhh, hadn't even thought about it," said Annie, squirming in her seat.

"Me either," said Jeff, scratching the back of his neck. "Sorry, what's that Shirley?" he hastily called out. "The rain's not as bad and you're going to start to drive?"

Shirley had a staring competition with him via the rear-view mirror, tossing up whether or not to comment on his unease, before deciding to cut him some slack. "Alright people, buckle up and let's get this show on the road. This woman needs to get home to her Sugar Boots."

The van rattled to life, causing all of the candy hearts to become unstuck. Jeff and Annie watched the 'kiss me' heart land between them on the seat. They both glanced at it and swapped small smiles before turning to look at the scenery pass by their windows.

* * *

><p>Annie sat with Jordan and Elijah on the sofa while they played video games and teased one another about their lack of shooting skills.<p>

"Are you sure your mom lets you play this game?" said Annie, as yet another grenade went off.

"Oh yeah," nodded Elijah. "Momma's got the high score!"

Annie grinned. "That is very useful information to know. Do you guys want a snack or something?" The boys chorused 'yes' so Annie stood up to head for the kitchen, tensing when she heard a noise at the front door. Picking up an umbrella, she slowly reached for the door handle and thrust it open.

"Hiyahhhhhhh!"

"Holy crap, Annie, what the hell are you doing?"

"What the hell am I doing?" she said, clutching her chest when she realized it was Jeff. "What the hell are _you_ doing? I thought you were an axe murderer – or a violent raccoon!"

He blinked at her in bewilderment. "And you thought the best way to approach things was to hit them with an umbrella-karate chop combo?"

"I panicked OK!" They stood there catching their breaths until Annie revisited her earlier thought. "Jeff, what _are _you doing here?" She looked at the envelope in his hands. "And what's that?"

"Oh, right," he said sheepishly. "Well, before you tried to kill me, I was going to leave you a surprise."

A pleased smile crossed her face. "You were?"

"Yeah." He fidgeted, creasing the side of the envelope between his fingers. "God this is lame. I'm sorry, I'm just going to stop acting out 90210 on the doorstep like some tool and…"

"Jeff? Just give me the envelope."

He handed it over, apprehensively waiting to gauge her reaction. Annie opened it up and found a card inside with 'In Sympathy' written on the front in gold embossed lettering. "No Valentine's cards left, huh?" she smiled.

"Keep reading…"

Annie flipped open the card and read it, feeling a fluttering in her stomach.

_If I ever tell you that you're 'the coolest' you have my permission to kill me and attend my funeral with a smile. _

_You'll always be more than that. _

_Jeff_

"You're a giant dork, you know that?" she said, gazing at him fondly.

He grinned at her. "Don't tell anyone, OK? Oh, and Annie?"

"Yeah?"

Jeff stepped forward and kissed her, bringing their bodies closer together as she leant in and sighed contentedly.

"Happy Valentine's Day."

_End._


End file.
